OTONO-56The doctor’s words provoked a chemical reaction of acidity that gnawed at Susana’s insides while dissipating all her body heat. Her legs began to tremble, and her lips turned white and cold as ice.

“I’m really sorry, but Ana won’t be able to go home with you. I have also ordered that Eduardo and you be tested for covid-19. ” Said the doctor, but her words bounced off the void of silence existing in Susana’s brain that she continued to be stunned by the news. Eduardo was the first to react, “Doctor, I want to see my wife before I go home.”

With a soft and compassionate intonation, the doctor replied, “I am very sorry, but Ana is in isolation, she cannot receive visitors. Very soon the ambulance will come to take her to the hospital. But if you prefer, I can offer you a private room here in the clinic, with a glass window where you can see her. Although you will not be able to approach her, you will be able to come visit her frequently. You should also know that it will be very difficult for you to hear her if you try to speak through the glass. “

OTONO-48With tears in her eyes and an aching heart Susana said, “We will accept the private room, I can pay for it.”

“Well, then we will wait for the results of the tests that we are going to do on both of you to see if you are not infected and so that you will be able to return to your home. Ana will be escorted to her private room tomorrow afternoon. So, come tomorrow you will be able see her through the window. ” Said the doctor.

The results of the covid-19 tests performed on Eduardo and Susana came out negative. During the trip home neither of them said anything. According to the Dr.’s instructions, Irene would also have to be tested for covid-19 as soon as possible, since she had stayed at Susana’s house taking care of the twins.

The night came in total darkness, without stars to illuminate the tired faces of Susana and Eduardo. Their thoughts wandered between the uncertainty of not having been able to say goodbye to Ana and their wish that she would recover very soon. Neither of them were able to sleep that night. The light of the new day began to illuminate everything in its path, bringing warmth and luminosity to everything it touched. In contrast to the cold and painful feeling of helplessness that Eduardo felt when he could not do anything to change the situation they were facing.

Irene and Susana established a schedule to take care of the twins, leaving Eduardo free to be close to Ana for as long as the doctor allowed him. Time passed slowly. It seemed that the clock had gotten tired of ticking the hours quickly and moved its hands with heavy slowness, generating impatience and despair in Eduardo who longed for sunset to arrive so he could visit Ana.

OTONO-49Locked in her room and praying on her knees in front of her bed, Susana lifted her heart and thoughts to heaven; praying that the doctors would find a way to regain Ana’s health, when Eduardo knocked on her door, “Susana, I’m going to the clinic. I need to be close to Ana. If they don’t let me in, I’ll stay there until they let me see her. ” Susana tried to answer, but her voice cracked inside her throat and unable to resist anymore, she began to cry. Hearing Susana’s cry, Eduardo felt his own heart compress inside his chest. Without saying anything else, Eduardo went to the clinic.

When Eduardo arrived at the clinic, he asked if he could visit his wife. The nurse who treated him said, “The doctor needs to talk to you before you can see your wife. Stay in the waiting room for a moment, the doctor is coming. ” Eduardo felt like his entire body was invaded by an electric current that hindered his movements.

 Eduardo was very nervous when the doctor approached him, “I’m sorry to tell you that Ana’s condition became complicated. During the night the infection worsened, and her lungs collapsed. Ana is breathing artificially. The disease developed rapidly in her respiratory system, causing severe and irreversible complications. Although you will not be in direct contact with her, you must follow all the security measures to be able to see her through the window of her room.

OTONO-50Eduardo listened and acted automatically, without being able to define what he was feeling. When he got to Ana’s room and looked at her through the window, the visual impact that his sense of sight received instantly transferred to his entire nervous system, causing intense pain in the depths of his heart. His eyes became filled with tears, his lips trembled, and his thoughts were nullified, desensitizing any emotional particle that could collapse his ability to assimilate the suffering that he was experiencing at that moment.

Ana was tubed. Her face was pale. Her body without movement. Part of her hair falling back, hanging over the side of her pillow. Her lips were cracked and without the bright red heat of her blood. Eduardo sighed deeply when he realized the deep silence that separated him from Ana. He placed her hand on the glass that kept her isolated. Wishing the glass in the window would fade, her fingers slowly slid down. His eyes were flooded with tears, obscuring the vision of her, while his hand separated completely from Ana’s hand, yearned to be able to feel the warmth of her body.

His thoughts took him back in time and he whispered through the window, “Ana, I want your gaze to find mine and make me tremble with emotion. But seeing you like this; the pain betrays me and forces me to close my eyes because my heart collapses. “

OTONO-55The emergency light came on at that moment. The doctor and a nurse entered the room. Ana’s heart stopped. The doctor tried to revive her again, but he did not succeed. Eduardo watched everything that was happening through the window, feeling that from that moment on his body would lack the strength to continue living alone. At that time Eduardo was living the trauma nightmare of watching the light in Ana’s eyes disappear forever.

OTONO-52Living in the impotence of not being able to get close to her, his mind tormented him with the memory of her face engraved in his hands from the last time he could touch her. And while the doctor disconnected the tubes and cables; Eduardo raised his trembling hand, placed two fingers on his lips and sent her a kiss, while with his voice choked by tears, he said softly from the depths of his heart, “I LOVE YOU.”

OTONO-53Suddenly, in a last attempt to express what he felt, the adrenaline in his body fired up and, trying to get Ana to hear him, he shouted with great power, “Ana, wait for me at the entrance of heaven as if it were the entrance of the school, because when the time passes and my turn comes to fly towards you, you will know that you have always been united with me, because I LOVE YOU! ” Then he fell down on the ground and started crying bitterly in a fetal position.



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